In 2010, Notre Dame ended an eight-game losing skid to USC in a rain-soaked 20-16 Irish win at Memorial Coliseum.

While Matt Barkley sat that game out with a bad ankle, backup quarterback Mitch Mustain came in and did a great impression of backup quarterback Mitch Mustain, while as a team, USC looked flatter than Matt Millen’s head.

Notre Dame fans watched Robert Hughes drag most of the USC defense and half their cheerleading squad all the way down the field in a classic display of power football to score on the Irish’s final drive. Moments later they held their breath while USC’s Ron Johnson butterfingered a wide-open, game-winning touchdown pass.

Streak over.

In 2011, USC will storm Notre Dame Stadium looking for that one cheerleader who was so impressed that to this day she refuses to let go of Robert Hughes’ ankle.

In a true understatement, however, the men of Troy are seeking more than just the return of an over-clingy tart named Helen. They want revenge.

It won’t be easy.

Reason No. 1: USC’s Offensive Line Will Struggle to Block My Mom

My mom is a 5’0” 175 pound tough old Polish woman with fifteen kids and a real mean streak when she’s on a bender, so it’s understandable that the USC line might have trouble getting the right pad level to stop her intimidating combination of body blows, bull rushes and spin moves.

That’s bad news for the protection Trojans are used to giving their stud QB (team names with double meanings are very funny).

A USC  line must be consistent because their offense starts with the run, which feeds their play-action game. The pro-syle attack also has deeper drops that often require linemen to hold their blocks longer.

An erratic line negates a lot of their skill players’ abilities to dominate the game. Last year’s USC line had real trouble blocking Notre Dame. This year they lose three starters from that group.

USC does have experience at key spots, including center Khaled Holmes and left tackle Matt Kalil, but the rest of the positions will be fought over by a combination of mostly redshirt sophomores, freshmen and the only three remaining fat kids in that salad-eating state.

Yes, as with all things USC, the candidates are all former high school All-Americans, but no matter if you are the 55-star athlete USC always gets, it takes time to physically develop college lineman and master the technique, timing and teamwork needed to be a quality line.

This is one unit that will definitely struggle in 2011.

Reason No. 2: The USC Pass Defense Is Sorely Confused

My 40 time isn’t under double digits so far this spring, but with my precision route running, I look to put up some decent numbers against the Trojans in 2011.

That’s because USC finished 2010 ranked 109th in pass defense, giving up 3,374 yards.  That’s bad. You’ve really got to go out of your way not to defend to give up that kind of real estate. Like, “Why are we in Nevada?” out of the way.

Believe it or not, the horrific 2010 Michigan secondary only gave up 3,123.

USC’s highly talented but youthful group had real trouble learning and executing defensive coordinator Monte Kiffin’s complex linebacker dropping, attacking, NFL-style defense.

The cantankerous 71-year-old Tampa 2 architect Kiffin spent 25 years in the NFL studying defenses while perfecting his system, and dadgummit he’s gonna run the damn thing no matter what these little whippersnappers think.

Needless to say, that kind of cranky attitude hasn’t played well with USC’s uber-talented athletes who understandably lack some of the more refined pro-level skills, knowledge and experience needed to run his defense.

The real quandary is that the more Pappa Kiffin has to go against his principles to dummy down his defense to match the learning restrictions and skill set of a college athlete, the less aggressive and effective the defense will be.

As long as USC’s coordinator is the real Monte, there is no quick fix here.

Reason No. 3: The USC Swagger is Gone.

ND knocked on the door when they lost to USC 34-27 in a close contest in 2009. Last year the Irish won 20-16 at USC to break through and end an eight-game losing streak to the Trojans.

The 500-pound USC gorilla is no longer breaking Irish backs, and both teams know it.

This Notre Dame team no longer feels that no matter what they do, USC will beat them, and even better, they know they beat USC with a freshman QB at the Coliseum.

This isn’t the confident group of Pete Caroll’s Trojans that dominated the college football landscape year after year.

These are Lane Kiffin’s wide-eyed kids who lost five games in 2010, one a particularly discouraging late season 37-6 embarrassment at Oregon State.

USC’s former swagger has turned into more of a wobble.

Reason No. 4: I’ve Got Things in My Refrigerator Older Than The Trojans.

The Trojans lose 16 seniors from 2010, including many key players. All PAC-10 first team juniors DT Jurrell Casey and OT Tyron Smith punched a ticket to the NFL draft.

What is left is a roster so young, the team has issued pillows and has organized nap times each afternoon. Confirming their immaturity, four players were recently cited for underage drinking at an off-campus party when they were caught with beer bottles that had rubber nipples on them.

Out of USC’s 80 scholarship players, 51 are underclassmen, of which 37 are freshman or redshirt freshmen who have never set foot into a college game.

Most of this team doesn’t shave yet, six are still trying to get their driver’s licenses and one still thinks girls have “cooties,” which they do.

By injuries, attrition and necessity, many of these underclassmen are going to have to play major roles in 2011, whether they’re ready or not.

Reason No. 5: Lane Kiffin is USC’s Coach.

There are two people in this world that are living testimony that it is possible to get by on looks alone. They are Tyra Banks and Lane Kiffin, in that order. And although painfully stupid, Tyra might make the better coach.

Honestly, Kiffin’s ability to land great gigs in the face of career mediocrity is mystifying. He must have compromising pictures of somebody fairly important, like God.

Yes, as USC’s offensive coordinator, he managed to do well with such mediocre college talent like Lendale White, Reggie Bush, Matt Leinhart and 20 or so other future pros.

As a head coach however, his NFL record is 5-15 with a 7-6 record at the University of Tennessee, who he royally screwed to bolt for USC and a $4. million salary. $4. million for a 12-21 career head coach?

He’s been a consistently average game coach and has often angered fans, opponents and media alike with immature and inaccurate statements at every stop, although he has recently dropped “Nany nany boo boo!!!” along with his signature “sticking-your-tongue-out” debate style.

His trademark teams are rarely prepared, lack discipline, show consistently poor execution and get progressively worse as the lack of direction and fundamentals take their toll.

Other than that he’s been pretty impressive.

Kiffin recruits great talent and hopes to out-talent you. That’s as deep as he goes.

And yes, Lane Kiffin is a great recruiter.

Let me also say that recruiting for USC is a lot like walking into a dog pound in a meat suit and hoping they like you.

Given enough time to suck the life out of this program before his dashing good looks grow old with the USC faithful, Lane Kiffin may be Notre Dame’s best chance to dominate this series for years to come.

A Summary of Two Summaries

Notre Dame Analyst Kelly McSlappy:

Notre Dame will dominate USC in 2011

Going into 2011, an already erratic Trojan offensive line has been virtually gutted. It’s very possible that at least three new replacements will be playing their first college game together in USC’s opener on Sept. 3 against Minnesota.

USC’s defense, which already struggled mightily to grasp Monte Kiffin’s complex schemes, will have four new faces to add to what has been a painfully long learning curve.

With 64 percent of the team comprised of underclassmen, USC no longer has a veteran squad that knows how to handle pressure on the biggest stages.

And Lane Kiffin is very pretty.

In sum, there are some huge dents in the Trojan armor, so expect the Irish to flatten them in 2011.

USC Analyst Marcus Maximus Slappy:

USC will dominate Notre Dame in 2011

Breathe easy USC masses, returning junior QB Matt Barkley is thankfully no Mitch Mustain. Barkley has another impressive slew of talented running backs and arguably the best, deepest receiving corp in the country.  

At times, with Barkley healthy, USC’s 2010 offense was simply unstoppable, even with one of the poorer lines, by USC standards, in recent memory.

Although our line will again be green and inconsistent, USC will have spring and fall practice and the first six games to help mold some incredibly talented athletes into talented lineman.

The USC defense returns the entire rotation of a ferocious line, and the pass defense will have an extra year of practice and game experience to learn more of the nuances of Monte Kiffin’s aggressive system.

By the way, our “awful” pass defense picked Notre Dame three times and held the Irish to a paltry 149 yards passing in 2010.

Notre Dame is definitely improved, but their quarterback play is a work in process, and their defense didn’t have to contend with our best quarterback on a dry field.

USC just has too much talent to lose two in a row to ND.

The Dan Stockrahm Tiebreaker:

Good points by both Slappy’s, but for my money, I don’t think we’ll see a Lane Kiffin team beat a Brian Kelly team.

Ever.

And we’re keeping Helen.

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