I don’t like that you don’t wear glasses. John Clayton wore glasses. You think you’re better than John Clayton?

I don’t like how you’ve worked your way up the NFL studio analyst ladder at ESPN like an undersized lineman working his way up the depth chart

I don’t like the way your broad shoulders make your head look tiny. I suspect you’re constantly wearing football pads underneath your pinstripe suit, in case a game breaks out.

I don’t like your pinstripe suits. What, are you trying to be a gangster, Mark Schlereth? You’re not a gangster, you’re a studio analyst.

I don’t like that you try a l...

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